-Sunbeam me Sidestep-
Twist me sunbeam and kiss me starlight
the last shadow I sidestepped across looked just like you
minus the cynicism
minus the makers mark mouth
minus the midas touch thong
minus the johnny walker
night crawlers
playing whispers
like wallow
playing in the wind
like chimes like
ringtones
only the dogs
in men could hear
you'd say
Maze, you didn't split my mayday hymen in two
Maze, you didn't beat my sanity silly
Maze, you didn't skip my heartbeat and skip away stoned
Cupid didn't have a
designated driver
the night
blind love
swerved you
in and out
of my control
-cpmaze-
Looking Through the Glass
I didn't see myself as very pretty
from the 'way' that I view others
I have always appreciated those around me
More than my own set of
Energy I take from the table...
I have a thing for others
Seems like my interest in the mind has proved a social need.
I've always loved people
The way they move
Smile
Talk
act
Think
The way they think they talk, sound, think, love, feel... or how they think they're acting
And I just love them, for who they are
Ever cascading and changing
Into a self they didn't 'plan'
They want confirmation
Is that okay, by me? I mean
By you?
Do you confirm the confirmation or-affirmation I self I have been
Battling/striving for my entire
Existence
I mean, not just here
Or there
I have been in a state of everywhere
Since flux became the only constant
For Christ ever walked the earth you identify with
I mean
I have the same fear of the unseen
But I trust the unseen more then what my eyes witness
My
Soul knows for herself
Because faith has been my entertainer
Surprising me on most days
In the worst ways
For the better
Gods humor placates with human
Emotion
I didn't ask or refuse this either
But my heart
Gets weaker with resistance
Don't put up such a self struggle
Fight for your mind instead
And rise for a heightened height
Once we reach the top we
No longer
Want
Because we can see
'Everything'--said Bob
Sunny
Letters to my Coolridge
Dear Sam, I get it. Especially the type of person that I am, I get THAT kind of loneliness. Even when you're surrounded by friends and fam, its just not the same. We want that weight of someone else's heart in our hands. To watch someone hold ours in/on their mouth during oral. Or in their smile when you laugh together. Or in that silence when you're just holding each other and zoned out in a movie or tv show. There's something about THAT weight that makes us feel more at home than home. It was real for us. Even if they never cared to stay or completely oblivious to the depth of our feelings, it doesn't invalidate what we're capable of. Its like they were all ponds. Bodies of water only aware of their surface. But when we would jump in, we dived to the bottom, leagues beneath them, a whole world of love and self reflection to learn and absorb. And when we'd come back up for air, they freak, they can't understand anything past swimming on the surface. All they see is we disappeared inside of them. And because they can't comprehend how that is even possible, they freak, and bail. And although that happens, time and time again, it doesn't make our deep sea exploration anyless real. We did the same earlier in life. People who loved us and we were just like, whatever dude. Chucked the duce. On to the next one. I would like to hope, everyone learns, eventually. It would be really sad, thinking of the people who will never understand how to love like we do. It opens you up to sooo much pain and longing, but fuck, the passion we carry when our love is in full force, it could burn fires down. *sighs* I hope you don't feel alone for too long. I feel like we get each other more so than, if not just as much, as any of the closest lovers I've opened up to. I know you want someone to hold you and tell you, you're beautiful. I'll help you hold your liquor when you can't do it alone. And I always think you're beautiful, especially with my eyes closed. Signed, Your Wordsworth
P.S. I feel like we have a healthy amount of self absorbtion.
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